


Table Read

by Aria_Lerendeair



Category: Shadowhunters (TV) RPF
Genre: Blanket Burrito Matt Daddario, Character Bleed, Cuddling, First Time, Frottage, Hair Pulling, Hurt/Comfort, Insecurity, M/M, Making Out, No Wives/GFs Verse, Pining, Praise Kink, Wall Sex, cuteness, dirty talking, handjobs, sap
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-02
Updated: 2020-04-02
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:48:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23441203
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aria_Lerendeair/pseuds/Aria_Lerendeair
Summary: After having a tough time with the Season Two breakup - Matt is excited and thrilled to receive the script for the season finale.  He immediately suggests a table read with Harry, and heads over to his trailer to do just that.  However, as they are reading it becomes clear to him that it isn't handled quite the way he thinks Alec would.So he ad libs, and it leads to more than he ever expected.
Relationships: Matthew Daddario/Harry Shum Jr.
Comments: 24
Kudos: 195
Collections: Favorite Malec Stories





	Table Read

**Author's Note:**

> All right darlings, I have taken a (frankly) diving leap into some RPF for our very lovely boys. So, please keep in mind standard disclaimers apply - this is a FICTIONAL work, and does not actually reflect the people themselves. Anyone who has a problem with this can hit the back button. Flames will be thoroughly mocked and pretty much guarantee I'll write more out of spite. 
> 
> (I'll probably write more anyways.) 
> 
> THIS IS ALL EM'S FAULT, JUST FOR THE RECORD.

“Perfect, now reset, and let’s go again!” 

Matt sucked in a pained breath and forced himself to nod in response to the call, stepping out of the way so the set could be reset. He blinked hard, resisting the urge to press his fingers to his eyes. The scene rushed over him in pieces. The gentle kiss, the cupping of his face, the way he leaned into it, leaned into every touch, until he backed away and left. 

“Matt?” Harry called. 

Matt startled under the soft hand to his shoulder, pulling himself back. Harry, not Magnus, this was Harry, he needed to remember that. Harry wasn’t leaving him, Magnus was leaving Alec. It was different, no matter how real it felt, it was different. “Sorry,” he muttered, rolling his shoulders, trying to focus and force a smile to his face. “We ready to go again?” 

“Yeah,” Harry said, studying him. “Do you need another few minutes? I can ask-” 

“No,” Matt interrupted, shaking his head. “I’m fine. Come on, let’s go. Time to sell it, right?” 

Harry’s mouth turned down in a frown when Matt strode away from him and back to his mark. After a moment, he moved to his and took a deep breath, straightening his shoulders and twisting his fingers, letting himself fall into the comfort of a role he could step into whenever he needed. 

Playing through the scene again, Matt kept his composure, only barely, more raw emotion coming out as he watched Magnus, not Harry, _never_ Harry, walk away from him, the elevator door shutting between them, cutting off their eye contact. Matt turned away quickly once the director called cut and wiped at the corner of his eyes, taking a shaky breath. He looked back towards the elevator, pushing his hands through his hair. He was done for the day, he could slip away. 

Heading straight for his trailer, Matt kept his head down and wiped at his eyes. It hadn’t been real, fuck it hadn’t been _ real, _ but that didn’t make it hurt any less. Matt blew out a hard breath and once he was blissfully behind the door of his trailer, he scrubbed the makeup off his face and spent a few minutes forcing himself to breathe slowly over the sink. If a few tears slipped out as he was scrubbing his face, that was his own business. 

He heard his phone ping and glanced down, seeing a message from Harry. Matt sighed and didn’t bother opening it, going to his couch, stretching out on it as best he could, pulling the blanket off the back, tugging it over him. He closed his eyes and curled up a bit more. Nothing about today had been real, he hadn’t failed Harry, he wasn’t going to leave and never come back. Matt tightened his fingers in the blanket and forced himself to breathe. It was just a bad character bleed day. He was going to be okay. 

His phone started to vibrate across the table and Matt spared a brief look at it before he closed his eyes and curled up tighter, a few more tears escaping to be quickly swiped away by the blanket. He just needed to be alone for a while, he needed to remember that the scene wasn’t real, that Harry didn’t hate him, that they were going to be okay. 

“Matt?” Harry called, carefully opening the door to Matt’s trailer. None of the crew had seen Matt head this way, but he had to at least check before he started looking elsewhere. “You in here?” 

Matt scowled and curled up tighter under the blanket, hiding his face. Maybe if he didn’t say anything, Harry would leave and he could, he could get himself back to normal. But then there was the sound of a door being locked and soft footsteps approaching. He cursed under his breath. 

“There you are,” Harry said, his voice soft. He knelt down next to the couch and reached out to squeeze Matt’s arm. “I locked the door. Let Dom know you had a rough day filming and I was here.” 

Matt wanted to cry harder. He didn’t deserve these friends who took such good care of him. He hunched his shoulders and felt Harry’s hand slide up his arm and to his hair, combing his fingers through it. Against his will he melted into it, leaning into the touch immediately. 

“Such a cat,” Harry said, his voice fond as he smiled, keeping up the gentle petting. When Matt didn’t say anything further, just stayed curled under the blanket, he gave a small tug to his hair. “Can you tell me what’s wrong?” 

Matt shifted just enough so he could peek at Harry from the blankets. Harry was kneeling in front of the couch, playing with his hair, looking like he could do it forever. His heart tightened painfully in his chest and he bit down on his lip. “Just stupid shit. Today was hard.” 

“Bad Lightwood day?” Harry asked. He knew that sometimes Matt would have bad days for reasons outside of his character, but today had probably been a character driven day. He gave Matt’s scalp a gentle massage as he played with his hair. “It’s okay if that’s what it was.” 

Matt nodded, closing his eyes as he pressed into Harry’s hand more. “Yeah.” 

Harry hummed, keeping up the soft touches, gently brushing some of Matt’s hair off his forehead, smiling when their eyes met when Matt blinked up at him tiredly. “Want to talk about it?” 

Matt shook his head, looking up at Harry. 

“Well,” Harry said, settling in more comfortably. “Then there’s only one thing to do.” 

Matt blinked and raised an eyebrow. He shivered when Harry carefully ran his thumb over his eyebrow, tracing the scar there. He smiled and leaned into the touch. 

“Tell me about something you’ve read, Matt. Anything. What have you googled lately?” Harry said, his voice soft. “Go on a rant, just for me, Matt. I’ll listen as long as you want to talk.” 

Matt smiled and took a deep breath, lowering the blanket a little bit more. “You won’t stop touching my hair?” 

Harry shook his head. “Nope. Go ahead.” 

Matt hummed and let his eyes fall shut. “Did you know that the samurai and cowboy eras came to a close at almost the same time?” 

Harry chuckled. “Really?” 

“Mmmhmm. Listen, I was reading, because Kat showed me this thing on Instagram…” 

~!~

Later, after Matt had dozed off and was snoring adorably (Harry would never admit that the ad libbed line about Alec’s snores had come from Matt himself), into his couch cushions, he stood and got Matt more properly tucked under the blanket, and a pillow for his head. At least now, all of the sadness and melancholy that had been in his face was gone. 

Harry combed his fingers through Matt’s hair once more, smiling at the absolute ridiculous bird’s nest of messy hair before he pulled his hand away. He leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to Matt’s forehead. “Sleep well, Matthew. You earned it today. Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere.” 

Harry smiled down at Matt before he stretched and popped a few much-needed joints before relaxing again at the adorable image of Matt smushed into his favorite pillow. Now he needed food, and a beer or two. He headed towards the door, flicking down the lights as he went. 

“Mmm, Harry…” 

Harry paused and looked back towards Matt. It looked like he was still asleep, even though there was a hand and an arm now hanging off of the couch. He shook his head and rolled his eyes in exasperation, climbing the steps and crouched down, lifting Matt’s hand. “I’m right here,” he whispered, leaning in to press a kiss to the back of his hand. “Maybe you’ll notice someday.” 

Tucking Matt’s hand back in with another soft kiss, Harry smiled and stood up again, letting himself out of Matt’s trailer, closing the door behind him. He sent Dom a quick text letting him know that Matt was sleeping it off and he’d be all right in a few hours. He headed for his own trailer, grabbing a beer out of the fridge immediately, popping it open, gulping down a few quick swallows. 

Harry sighed and flopped down on the couch. He should have called for a break. He’d known better. In that last take, the devastation in Matt’s eyes had been real. It hadn’t been Alexander that Magnus had been walking out on, at least not for Matt. He should have found Matt right after the scene, checked in on him. But he’d wanted to change and get his makeup off, and that had taken longer than he’d wanted it to. 

He took another sip of his beer. He knew better than to have a crush (or more, not that he’d ever admit more) on one of his co-stars. He did. Hell, he probably knew it better than most of the people on set. But Matt was… Matt was  _ Matt.  _

From the first time they’d met, where Matt had passionately introduced himself and then gone on to say that he wanted to play their characters as the loving couple they actually were and fucking  _ sell _ it, sell the attraction, the falling in love, the heartbreak, all of it. He’d been an excitable puppy, but Harry no more could have said no than he could have said no to anything. And when Harry had agreed, the smile that had gotten him…. 

He’d lost any intentions he’d had of staying a bit aloof from his coworkers right then and there. Harry smiled. That had, ultimately, been a good thing, and he didn’t regret it for a second. But a small part of him, the part of him that reminded just how these things usually went, didn’t mind reminding him just how careless he’d been with his heart. 

Harry exhaled hard, closing his eyes to stretch out on his own couch, smiling faintly as he remembered blanket burrito Matt. For just a moment, he let himself imagine Matt curling up around  _ him _ instead of just a blanket. Being able to play with Matt’s hair, Matt’s head on his chest, snoring against his neck until he fell asleep too. Harry took a deep breath and shook himself. He knew better than to get lost in imagining things that he didn’t have, and  _ wouldn’t _ ever have. 

He’d take whatever small pieces he could get of Matt and pretend that they were enough. He was good at that, if nothing else. 

~!~ 

Harry flipped through the script, unable to keep from grinning as he read through their reconciliation. Thank god. If they’d had to end the rest of the season without at least some type of resolution the fans would have gone crazy. He smiled and read through it again, closing his eyes to picture the scene in his mind. It would be a good one. He hummed and grabbed his phone, about to text Matt when an alert came through. 

_ Matt: Did you see, did you see, did you SEE?!  _

Harry laughed at the enthusiasm. He’d gotten his script more than an hour before Matt, which meant that Matt hadn’t bothered to look at the rest of it, had probably flipped through to find their scenes. He didn’t let his heart give a stubborn little flip at that knowledge, that maybe Matt was most excited about scenes with  _ him. _

_ Harry: Yes, of course I saw, I was just about to text you!  _

_ Matt: Can I come over? I wanna practice!  _

Harry swallowed and typed out an _‘Of course!’_ before he could think better of it. He glanced down at the script where they shared a gentle kiss and felt his heart start pounding against his will. He took a deep breath. They were just going to do a table read, it wasn’t going to be anything more than that. He went and pulled out a highlighter and his post-its, moving over to his table when he heard the enthusiastic knocking on his door that could only come from one person. 

“Come in!” he shouted, looking back down to the script in front of him as Matt bounded up the stairs, a bright grin on his face. 

“Harry!” Matt greeted, holding onto his script, unable to keep the grin off his face. “I can’t believe it, they’re gonna let us reconcile before the end of the season, I’ve been so worried that we were going to have to wait until next _season._ ” He slid into the seat across from Harry and bumped their feet together. “Aren’t you excited?” 

Harry grinned at him. “Oh you bet. Did you see the earlier scene where I get to sass you and save your ass?” 

Matt’s eyes widened and he flipped through the script. “No! What?” 

“I’m the High Warlock of Brooklyn,” Harry teased, smirking and winking at Matt. 

“You actually get to say that to me?” Matt asked, laughing, flipping through the script again. “You sassy asshole.” 

Harry grinned. “You know you love me.” The words made his chest tighten in a painful way that he could and did ignore, but when Matt looked up at him, a genuine and small smile on his face, it took everything to keep from seeing more. 

“Of course I do,” Matt said, his voice quiet, even as he smiled. “You’ve helped me so much Harry, I can’t even begin to thank you.” 

Harry smiled back at him and reached out, giving Matt’s arm a squeeze. “You’d do the same for me and you know it.” 

Matt grinned and looked back down at the script. “Want to read through both? Or just the ending scene? We can probably practice the ending scene properly since it is just us.” 

“Yeah, let me finish highlighting,” Harry said, looking back down at the script with a hum. “Fans are going to be excited that there’s a Malec kiss to end the season.” 

Matt laughed, bright and loud. “Harry,  _ I’m _ excited there’s a Malec kiss to end the season!” 

“So what you’re saying is that your livetweeting will murder all of the good fangirls out there?” Harry teased, highlighting another line. 

“They love it, they’re so thirsty,” Matt said with a grin, chewing on the edge of his highlighter. “Awwww, look at me being so sappy. I can’t live without you.” 

Harry swallowed and quickly looked away from Matt’s lips wrapping around the highlighter as he worked, focusing down on his script. “That’s going to be interesting to play off of.” He hummed and sat back in the seat, letting himself imagine how Magnus would react to a declaration like that. 

Matt hummed, looking down at the script, mouthing the lines. “I’m going to play it straight.” 

Harry raised both of his eyebrows at Matt and snorted. 

“Oh fuck off, you know what I mean,” Matt grumbled, looking down at the script. “But I think that’s exactly how Alec feels.” He tapped his jaw with the highlighter, reading the words again, smiling faintly. “I know…” he exhaled hard. 

Harry raised his eyebrows. “You know...what?” 

“I know we’re supposed to keep the kisses short, for our own comfort level, and, you know, the audience-” Matt smiled when Harry snorted. They’d both thrown that out the window, hard, with that first kiss, after all. “-but, you know. You don’t say something like ‘I don’t think I can live without you’ and have that declaration pretty much reciprocated...and then kiss like grandparents.” 

Harry snorted and looked back at the script. “You’ll have to show me what that kiss really looks like, then,” he teased. 

“Sure,” Matt said, shrugging as he highlighted another line. 

Harry froze, his breath stuck in his chest as he looked up at Matt. But Matt didn’t look up, didn’t even seem to register what he said. Clearing his throat, Harry focused back on the script in front of him, but the words were swimming in front of him as he imagined exactly how Matt might end up kissing him. Unless of course he was joking, because that was the far more likely answer. 

Matt hummed and looked over the script and smiled faintly. “I like this. I see Magnus standing off a bit to himself, sipping a drink and Alec makes his way over…” He tapped the script. He took a deep breath and let it out with a small chuckle. “Fuck, being able to see him without the threat of something about to kill them both…” 

Harry swallowed and nodded. “Yeah. They’re both nervous. Don’t know where they stand now, with...with everything.” 

“Alec knows where he stands,” Matt said, trailing his fingers over the script. “That’s never changed, will never change. Magnus is the one who isn’t sure.” 

“He’s scared,” Harry blurted and then cursed himself when Matt’s eyes met his. “Magnus. He’s, he’s terrified of what Alec means for him. What Alec  _ is _ to him.” 

Matt tilted his head a little. “And what’s that?” 

“ _ Everything, _ ” Harry whispered, clearing his throat. He looked down at his script again, but then Matt’s long fingers were curling around his wrist and their eyes met again. 

“Magnus is everything to Alec too. Always,” Matt said, his voice soft. He gave Harry a quick grin and squeezed his arm, gently, reminding him of just how true that was. “Want to start from your line asking me about demons?” 

Harry took a deep breath and nodded. “Sounds good.” Another brief second and he allowed himself to imagine that they were in a bar and Alec was striding towards him. He opened his eyes and looked at Matt with a faint smile and a raised eyebrow. “Any sign of demons?”

Matt shook his head, smiling back. “None. The sensor maps are completely clear of wraith demons.” He paused, frowning, because it didn’t make sense that they would just disappear like that. “It’s the strangest thing, it’s like they disappeared into thin air.” 

Harry pretended to toast Matt with a smile. “Well, then we can take this moment.” He raised his drink. “To celebrate.” They both mimicked clinking their glasses together, but when their knuckles brushed, Harry couldn’t help the small shiver that went through his hands. He brought the pretend glass back to his lips, moving awkwardly, but mimicking a drink. 

Matt lifted his pretend beer halfway to his lips and frowned before straightening his shoulders, looking at Harry. “Can we talk?” 

Harry swallowed hard, letting himself feel the weight of the hope behind those words. Matt’s delivery of them, the earnestness in his eyes was devastating. He nodded, short and quick. “Yeah.” 

“Then I walk past you into the alley, being all nervous as I pace a bit,” Matt said, waving a hand. He smiled faintly. “God, Alec’s gonna be so scared. He wants Magnus so badly, but Magnus left, he just has to try to make it right, now. Anything more is just…” Matt glanced up at Harry and quirked his lips. “Too much to hope for.” 

“And I down my drink, ha, good old fashioned liquid courage,” Harry smiles, his eyes flicking up to look at Matt, Matt who hadn’t looked away from him once. “Following Alec into the alley…” he blew out a hard breath. “They both have every right to be angry, Magnus for the Soul Sword, and Alec for the breakup, but the chance to fix things…” 

“They want to be together more than they ever want to be apart,” Matt said, his voice soft. “This proved that. Come on, let’s keep going.” 

Harry nodded and watched Matt fidget with his right hand, a nervous tic he’d given Alec that he did himself without realizing it most days. 

Matt took a deep breath and met Harry’s eyes. “Magnus, I’m sorry.” 

Harry shook his head, countering almost immediately. “Don’t apologize.” 

Matt hunched his shoulders. “No, I should have told you about the Soul Sword-“ 

“It’s in the past,” Harry interrupted, his voice firm and final about it, crossing his arms over his chest. 

Matt swallowed and nodded, taking a deep breath, before looking at Harry. “Magnus, ever since our breakup…” he paused, frowned at the script and wrinkled his nose. 

Harry blinked, watching Matt scowl at the script. “Not right?” 

“No,” Matt said, chewing on his lip. “Wouldn’t say breakup. He doesn’t want to believe they broke up, would do everything to  _ not _ say that.” 

“Ad lib it,” Harry encouraged softly. “You know I do that if I think I need to. If that’s not what Alec would say, change it. Look at me and say what Alec would, Matt.” 

Matt flushed a bit, chewing on his lip, looking back down at the line. “Thanks, Harry.” He took a deep breath and squared his shoulders, meeting Harry’s eyes again. 

“Magnus, ever since our... _ fights… _ ” he paused and waved a hand. “I...I can’t think straight…” 

Harry hesitated, shifting so he wasn’t meeting Matt’s eyes, that earnest look that he had to remind himself wasn’t for  _ him _ , it was for Magnus. “Well, I can’t do anything without thinking of you.” 

Matt stared at the line of Harry’s jaw, watching as he clenched it, playing the part perfectly as always. “Magnus, I…” he imagined stepping closer, into Harry’s space. “I don’t think I can live without you.” 

The sincerity in that statement, the honesty in it, rocked him and Harry had to breathe for a moment, meeting Matt’s eyes again, watching him give a fake shake of his head. He cleared his throat and said, keeping his voice soft, maybe just as hopeful. “I...I thought I had to choose between you and the Downworld…” Harry smiled faintly at Matt, at the encouragement there. “But I don’t.” 

Harry watched Matt’s face shift, just the faintest amount, his lips parting the barest bit, and he never wanted to look away, not ever. He cleared his throat and smiled. “A wise man once told me…” He straightened his shoulders, mimicking Alec with a wink. “Relationships take effort.” 

Matt chuckled, dropping his head for a moment, listening to Harry do the same. He licked his lips and met Harry’s eyes again. “Yeah, well. That was an understatement.” 

Harry laughed at the dry delivery, grinning at Matt, basking in the warm smile directed back at him, even though he knew it was Alec, for Magnus. He could pretend, just for a second. “And I step closer,” he hummed and smiled. “You know what’s  _ not _ an understatement?” 

“Kisses!” Matt said with a laugh, winking at Harry, breaking character. “Seriously though, there’s no way Alec would go gentle on that kiss. Getting Magnus back after thinking that he’d lost him forever because of his own mistakes?” He rolled his eyes and stood up, gesturing for Harry to get up as well. “Come on, come on, we need to try that again with the stage direction.” 

Harry laughed and slid out of the seat, picking up his script. “All right, all right. You did promise to show me how Alec would react properly, after all.” He meant it as a tease, but he couldn’t help but wonder if more yearning escaped than he meant to allow. Matt’s eyes met his and went dark, just for a second, before his co-star grinned. 

“Let’s start from my declaration, okay?” Matt said, tugging Harry into position. 

Harry crossed his arms over his chest and took a deep breath, looking off to the side of Matt. He could feel those puppy dog eyes on him already and he fought down the urge to smile. 

“Magnus,” Matt said, looking up at Harry, his expression solemn. “Ever since our... _ fights _ ...I, I can’t, can’t think straight.” 

Harry glanced at Matt and swallowed hard, his eyes darting away from Matt in the next second, looking to the side, rubbing the tips of his fingers together before forcing himself to admit. “Well, I can’t do anything without...thinking of you.” 

“Magnus I…” Matt took a step forward, tracing his eyes along Harry’s face, wanting to reach out and touch him, he was close enough to do it now. “I don’t think I can live without you.” 

Harry let himself meet Matt’s eyes properly, taking in the weighted honesty of that declaration, letting it settle into his chest. Magnus would be surprised at the openness, at the confession, after everything, but he would believe Alec, because he was a truly shit liar. 

Matt shook his head under Harry’s searching gaze and swallowed hard. His heart was pounding and he kept up their eye contact, wanting to sway even closer to him. 

Harry stepped closer to Matt, looking up at him, lowering his voice. “I...I thought I had to choose between you and the Downworld…” He watched Matt’s eyes shine that much brighter and reminded himself that Matt was acting, that this was Alec, looking at Magnus, not Matt at him. “But I don’t,” he continued. The hint of a smile appearing on Matt’s face was like the sun appearing on a cloudy day and Harry wanted to grin back at him, but forced himself to remain in the moment. 

“A wise man once told me,” Harry drawled, lilting his voice in the most teasing way possible. “Relationships take effort.” They chuckled together and Harry watched Matt take another step closer to him until they were almost touching. 

“Yeah, well,” Matt said, smiling a little. “That was an understatement.” 

Harry gave another quiet laugh and met Matt’s eyes and now they were shining and Matt was smiling at him, like, like… He forced himself to focus and not get lost in how much he wanted that smile directed at him for as long as he could have it. Instead, he closed the last of the gap between them, dropping his arms. 

“You know what’s  _ not _ an understatement?” he breathed. He could feel Matt’s hand sliding up his back, that same stupidly bright smile on his face, making his heart pound all the harder. Harry swayed in, tilting his chin up, watching Matt close his eyes. The thrill of their lips touching was all too short, but for those brief seconds, he savored it, until they both leaned back. His lips were still tingling. 

Harry grinned at Matt. “I’m all into parties, but-” 

“Wait, wait,” Matt said, shaking his head with a frown. “That doesn’t, you can’t look at me like that, and not, expect me, expect Alec to just…” 

“Hey,” Harry said, keeping his voice soft. “Matt, it’s okay. Tell me what was wrong?” 

Matt looked down at the script and tossed it onto the table, exhaling hard in annoyance. “That doesn’t feel like Alec!” 

Harry hummed. “I think they’re wanting you to play it tentatively, unsure of where Alec stands with Magnus. Which makes sense, considering everything.” 

“Harry,” Matt said, exhaling hard. “Alec  _ loves _ Magnus. With every single part of him that exists. He was devastated the second Magnus walked out that door, especially after saying ‘I love you’ to each other.” 

“I know,” Harry agreed, reaching out to squeeze Matt’s arm. “So what feels so wrong about what’s written?” 

Matt balled up one of his hands, rubbing his fingers together with a frown. He wanted to pace, but Harry’s hand on his arm was keeping him grounded and in place. “He needs to know that they’re okay. That  _ they’re _ going to be okay. A...a soft, chaste kiss, isn’t what he’d go for. That isn’t  _ them _ .” 

“Okay,” Harry agreed, giving Matt’s arm another squeeze. “What would Alec go for, then?” 

Matt’s eyes were bright as he grinned. “ _ Passion. _ A welcome home, and I missed you, I love you, I need you, please don’t leave, all in one.” 

Harry’s breath caught and he nodded. “That, that does sound more like Alec, yeah,” he managed to agree. 

“Okay, so,” Matt exhaled hard, before meeting Harry’s eyes. “Feed me the line again.” 

Harry watched as Matt stepped up and into his space all over again, his heart pounding hard. He stepped in close and uncrossed his arms, giving a faint smile. “You know what’s  _ not _ an understatement?” 

“Yeah,” Matt breathed, reaching out, cupping his hands around Harry’s face, watching his eyes widen the faintest amount. He smiled and swept his thumb carefully along his cheekbones. “This,” he answered, leaning down to kiss him properly. He didn’t let himself second guess or worry that he might push too far, Harry was always great about telling him if he did. 

The instant their lips touched, Harry felt the difference. The hint of desperation, the heat, the need, all of it wrapped into the perfect slide of Matt’s lips against his. He dropped his hands to Matt’s waist, tugging him in close, letting him lead the moment, his mouth falling open under the insistent and determined press of passion. It was too much, it would never be allowed on camera, not like this, not so obvious and good and everything he wanted, but couldn’t have. 

When Matt went to pull back, the hard press of the kiss easing off, Harry couldn’t prevent the small, tiny whine that escaped him. He tried, fuck he _ tried, _ but he couldn’t. When their lips finally fell apart with a wet, slick noise, he met Matt’s eyes, the half-lidded heat in them and shuddered, remembering all-too belatedly that they were pressed tightly together and that he was holding them there. 

“Fuck,” Matt breathed, exhaling hard, leaning in to press their foreheads together, his eyes falling to Harry’s lips. He wanted to laugh, to pull back, put some space between them, but Harry’s lips were wet and shiny and  _ there, _ and all he wanted was to devour them again. He wanted, fuck, he wanted to kiss Harry again. Again and again until he’d memorized the taste of his lips. 

“Matt,” Harry whispered. He didn’t want to break whatever spell was keeping Matt pressed up against him like this, his breath coming in harsh pants into the shared space between their lips, but he needed to make sure Matt was all right. He slowly rubbed his hand up and down Matt’s back, trying to coax him back from wherever his mind had run off to. Matt’s eyes quickly met his and with another curse breathed out against his lips, they were kissing again, this time with no pretense of holding back. 

Matt groaned, dropping his hands from Harry’s cheeks to his waist, yanking him in closer, shifting them until he was pressing Harry up against one of the cabinets in his trailer, the kiss turning wetter and hotter. When they eventually broke apart, panting harshly, he pressed their foreheads together again and bit down on his lip, his fingertips sliding under the edge of Harry’s shirt. 

“Tell me it’s me,” Matt breathed, staring at Harry, his chest heaving with every breath. “Not, not, Alec and Magnus getting carried away. This me, you, _us,_ right?” 

“Matt,” Harry breathed, his heart pounding. His head was swimming, and Matt was  _ so _ close and pressed up against him, hazel eyes pleading desperately that this was, this was something more than just their characters. That it was  _ them. _

“Harry, please,” Matt begged. “Please…” He swallowed, forcing the words past his lips. “Tell me that it was…” 

“Real?” Harry whispered the word like it was forbidden, even in the little space between them, as tightly as they were pressed together. He could see the fear and the hope warring in Matt’s eyes and even though it was a horrible, terrible idea, having everything he had wanted for months now pressed against him wasn’t something he could ever turn down. 

Matt nodded, brushing their noses together. “Yeah. Tell me it’s real,” he whispered, meeting Harry’s eyes. Slowly, tentatively, he leaned in until his lips were gently brushing Harry’s, shivering at the way they leaned into each other again. “Harry…” 

Harry shuddered at the soft whisper of his name and groaned against Matt’s lips, tightening his hands on Matt’s hips, yanking him in harder. “It’s real,” he managed to get the words out, feeling Matt’s whole body jerk at the admission. “It’s real,” he repeated, sliding his fingers up and under the back of Matt’s shirt, his skin bare and warm against his fingertips. 

“Fuck,” Matt swore again, shivering. He pulled back just enough to meet Harry’s eyes, licking his lips. “Can, can we, can I…” 

“Yes,” Harry breathed, tightening his fingers on Matt’s back, leaning in to press a kiss to his neck, trailing his lips along his jaw. He rolled his hips, shuddering when he let himself feel,  _ appreciate,  _ just how turned on they both were. “Whatever you want, Matt, all of it.” 

“Don’t say that,” Matt growled. “Don’t say that if you don’t fucking mean it, Harry.” 

Harry wanted to laugh, but instead he let himself  _ savor _ that growl, how it made his dick twitch with how much he liked it. Matt didn’t often get all rough and growly, but when he did it was an  _ experience.  _ He pulled back from Matt’s neck and met his eyes with a smirk Magnus would be proud of. “And if I do mean it?” 

Matt pressed Harry back against the wall of his trailer, dropping his head against Harry’s neck, panting hard against his skin. “Then we’re not gonna make it past this wall,” he muttered, moving his hands to Harry’s hips, pulling him into a desperate roll of his hips, fighting down a whine at the rough friction cascading up his spine. “Not yet, at least.” 

“Fuck, Matt,” Harry groaned, Matt’s long fingers curling over his hips. He couldn’t help but imagine those same fingers wrapped around his cock. A quick tilt of his head and they were kissing again, rough and frantic, all tongue and teeth, panting roughly into every desperate kiss. 

“ _Later,_ ” Matt promised on a harsh exhale as they parted briefly for air. He pressed their foreheads together and couldn’t help the steady grind of his hips against Harry, whining low in this throat. “Want you right here. With me. Like this.” 

“I refuse,” Harry panted, feeling Matt tense for the briefest of seconds before he slid his hands down and under the waistband of the track pants Matt was wearing, tugging him into the next hard roll of his hips, savoring the loud groan that got him. “To come in my pants like a teenager,” he added. 

Matt laughed, grinning at him. “Sure you don’t wanna relive the glory days?” He shimmied his hips, attempting to mimic Harry and yelped when it got him a slap to the ass. 

“Careful, Matthew,” Harry growled, digging his fingers into Matt’s ass, just to feel him shudder again. “Or I’ll have you spread out on my bed begging for me until you can think of nothing else.” When that threat had Matt’s hips stuttering against him, he smirked and licked his lips. “Like that, do you?” 

“Yeah, fuck, want that, Harry, please…” Matt whined. He sucked in a hard breath of air and pushed Harry’s shirt up a few inches before stopping, meeting his eyes again. “Can I?” 

“I don’t know,” Harry said, watching Matt’s pupils dilate. “ _ Can _ you, Matthew?” 

Matt shuddered, shoving the shirt up, fighting down the urge to whine when Harry had to move his hands in order to take it off. “Shut up,” he grumbled. He took the chance to rip off his own shirt, before pressing in close to Harry again. 

Harry laughed and closed his eyes as Matt’s hands landed at his waist again, sliding up and along his chest. He tilted his head back and shivered, reaching out to pull Matt in closer, spreading his legs enough for Matt to slide a thigh between his. “Why don’t you make me?” 

“What happened to not coming in your pants like a teenager,” Matt teased, rocking his hips grinding himself against Harry, leaning in to lick and suck at Harry’s neck, moaning against his skin. 

Harry wrapped an arm around Matt’s waist, yanking him into the next roll of his hips. He reached up with his free arm and tangled his fingers into Matt’s hair, giving it a firm tug, pulling another moan out of Matt. “I’m not going to come in my pants. But you, Matthew, you’re a different story.” 

“Fuck, I hate how much I like you using my full name like that,” Matt groaned, gasping as Harry tugged on his hair again. “Harry, please…” 

Harry chuckled, turning his head just enough so he could whisper into Matt’s ear. “Please? Please what?” Matt’s hips jerked frantically against his and he was panting hard, wet little breaths and whines escaping him. “Want me to tell you that I want to watch you come for me? And then when you’re done I want you to show me just how good your hand feels?” 

“Harry,” Matt moaned out. “Fuck, I can’t, it’s-” He cut himself off and pressed all of his body against Harry’s, caging him against the wall, but he’d never felt more out of control. His head was swimming and he was trembling and fuck, he was so close, he just needed a little bit more. 

Harry tugged on Matt’s hair again, listening to him whine, nipping at his ear lobe. “And then, when you’re done having me up against this wall,  _ Matthew, _ ” he paused and gave another impatient tug, just to feel Matt moan, low and long as he rolled his hips more and more desperately. “I’m going to take you to my bed, spread you out on my sheets and make you beg for me.” 

Matt gasped, his whole body starting to shake, he was going to fall apart, but he couldn’t stop, every thrust achy and too good to ever stop, he wanted to do this forever, wanted to fall apart in Harry’s arms and let Harry catch him. “Harry, I, fuck-” 

“Come on Matthew,” Harry whispered into Matt’s ear, softening his voice. “Let me see how beautiful, how  _ pretty _ you look when you come.” 

His orgasm hit in a violent rush, punched out of him at that word, at  _ Harry _ calling him pretty and all Matt could do was cling and ride out every wave of the aftershocks, breathing hard and trembling. Matt had never been more grateful for the arm Harry had wrapped around him, supporting him easily. “Holy shit…” he breathed, lifting his eyes to meet Harry’s again. 

Harry took in the flushed cheeks, the glassy eyes and how pink Matt’s lips were when he’d been thoroughly kissed and knew he’d never be able to give this up. He laughed and pulled Matt in for another kiss, melting into the languid press of Matt’s body, even as his dick reminded him that he definitely wasn’t satisfied yet. 

“I, uh, shit, give me one second,” Matt panted once they’d pulled apart, licking his lips, wrinkling his nose a little at the mess he could feel already staining his pants. 

Harry chuckled and was about to tease Matt when one large hand was squeezing his dick through his sweatpants. “Fuck, your  _ hands. _ ” 

“Like my hands?” Matt asked, licking his lips before he pulled his hand back and slipped his hand into Harry’s sweatpants, wrapping his hand properly around Harry’s dick, teasing his thumb over the precome at the tip. “I remember something about showing you how good my hands feel…” 

“Might have,” Harry panted, rocking his hips up and into Matt’s hand, reaching up to cling to his shoulders. “Might have said something like that.” He bit down on his lip and groaned. “You’ve got nice hands, Matt.” His grin went a little wicked and he smirked. “Can’t wait to see where else you can put them to use.” 

“Fuck,” Matt cursed and shuddered, tightening his hand around Harry before glaring at him. “You trying to torture me?” 

“Depends,” Harry groaned, laughing a bit until Matt started to jerk him faster, twisting his hand on the end of every stroke, bringing him to the edge embarrassingly quickly. “You enjoying it?” 

Matt cleared his throat. “More than I want to admit. But now it’s my turn to watch, yeah?” 

Harry held onto Matt’s shoulders, spreading his legs wider, his hips rolling up and into every touch of his hand, closing his eyes to focus on it. “Matt, fuck, keep going. Little faster.” 

“Yeah, yeah,” Matt rasped, obeying, keeping his eyes riveted to Harry’s face, watching his neck arch in pleasure. “Do you have any idea how many times I wanted to do this? How many times I fucking dreamed of, of this, or dropping to my knees for you?” He swallowed when Harry’s eyes snapped open and ensnared his. The heat in them had him shuddering, swaying closer until their foreheads were pressed together and they were breathing in the same space again. 

“Did you?” Harry panted, biting down a whine as Matt squeezed again, fighting his orgasm back, wanting to preserve this perfect moment, the heat of Matt’s eyes on him, how hot and big his hand was, how _good_ it felt. 

Matt laughed, stealing the quickest of kisses. “Yes, of course I did, Harry,” he admitted, his voice softening. “Wanted you, wanted this, wanted all of it.” 

He didn’t want to admit that it was that, that soft confession that Matt whispered against his lips that sent his orgasm roaring through him, making a mess of Matt’s hand and his sweatpants. Harry let his head fall back against the cabinet, panting hard. “ _Fuck,_ ” he whispered. 

“You’re beautiful,” Matt breathed, nuzzling in closer to Harry, pressing kisses to his neck and jaw. 

Harry leaned into the soft kisses, both of them savoring the quiet before he wrinkled his nose a little. “All right, as fun as this wall is, we both need the bathroom, and then my bed.” 

Matt blinked in surprise and started to smile. “I can stay?” 

Harry raised an eyebrow. “Did you think I’d kick you out?” 

“I wasn’t…” Matt shrugged and pulled himself back and away from Harry, giving him room to stand upright. “I wasn’t sure if it was just, heat of the moment, or, or something.” He bit down on his lip before offering up, quietly. “I want to stay as long as you’ll let me.” 

Harry’s heart pounded uncomfortably hard in his chest and he reached out, taking Matt’s hand, threading their fingers together, giving them a slow squeeze. “You’re welcome to stay as long as you want. I want you here.” He met Matt’s eyes with a smile and led them both towards the bedroom. 

**Author's Note:**

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